If you call me ____, You are _____
If you call me Todd, you could be most anyone.
If you call me Tom, you are someone at work who has trouble understanding when I identify myself over the phone, even when I over-annunciate the "dd."
If you call me ashi, you are someone from my Japanese class from 1987, or one of my friends, or someone I know online.
If you call me Chris, you are one of my co-workers from KVO where I went by that name, or a Jamba Juice employee. "Chris" is easier for people to get right than "Todd." See "Tom" above.
If you call me Tadashi, or Todd-ashi, you are someone who knew my fan name quite a while back, before it got shortened to ashi.
If you call me Hey Look at the Lesbians, you are someone who drove along 11th Street in San Jose some time in 1993, saw me kissing my Whatever, and mistook me for a woman from behind.
If you call me Robin, you are my Whatever, and this is still 1993 or 1994. See also Horny Toad and Heater, but please, don't ask.
If you call me Toddlet, you know I like to act like a kid sometimes.
If you call me Allis in Wonderland, you are a grade school kid who isn't very creative. My Dad was called the same thing over 40 years earlier.
If you call me Toad, you are one of my 6th grade classmates.
If you call me Frogger, you are my friend Scott in 6th grade.
If you tried to call me Toddy, you are a woman at church who was quickly corrected by my mom.
If you call me Odd Todd, you are right.
If you call me Snaggle Tooth, you are someone who knew me at church summer camp.
If you call me Max, you are someone who knew me in my early anime fandom days.
If you call me the Mad Bomber, you are someone who knew me from Boys' State.
If you call me Daddy, you are my daughter, Gretchen Bethany Clarke-Allis.
If you call me Mommy, you are one of my friends who has adopted me as a Mommy.
If you call me Clarissa, I am in drag.
If you call me Techie or Lutwitch, you have watched Zero way too much.
If you call me Todd A., you will get glared at. In 5th grade, there was another Todd, and he was just plain Todd, while I was called Todd A. Someone at KVO tried to call me Todd A., which is when I temporarily switched to Chris.